As a first time blogger, I am unsure of exactly what I'm doing and why. All I know is that writing is a passion of mine - a passion that's been around ever since I was little. I have always loved words...I guess its because my mother instilled this love in me ever since I was little. She loves words as well, but never to write. I've never seen her write fiction, nor non-fiction stories for that matter. But she loves to read.
Perhaps that's why I gained an interest in this blogging thing. Will I stick with it? Who knows. I'll try though. And as for my first entry, I don't know how interesting it will be. Heck, I highly doubt my blog will bring about the philosophical "interesting" moments that the famous ones seem to hold. All I know is that I love to write and that's that.
I've been wrestling for hours about what to write in this blog. I thought about love, about relationships, about God, about writing...but about 2 minutes ago I knew what I had to write about.
My mommy.
It may seem strange for a 22 year old college student to refer to her mother as "mommy" but I do. Why? I have no idea. I just like to do it for some reason. Perhaps its because deep down we still have a childlike quality among us. All I know is that the woman I call my "mommy" is probably the most important person in my life.
If you know me, then you know what tragedy my family has suffered from. If you don't, then I'll tell you. At 12 years old, I had to endure something that no child that age should have to: the sudden, unexpected death of my father. It was such a difficult time and I made a lot of stupid choices in the years that followed because of the anger and frustration that I felt. High school quickly became hell in my mind. I am sad to say that I wasted those years of my life.
But no matter what was going on in me or my younger sister, or even my mom's life, she stayed strong for us. She protected us and somehow managed to give us everything we needed despite the fact that she worked about 50 hours a week and, for a few years, took night classes through a local community college (of which now I am currently attending).
I know what the ultimate sacrifice is because of my mother. She slaved away as a waitress, on a waitress salary, working with customers that were jerks, and working long hours doing incredibly exhausting physical tasks...just so that my sister and I had a home to come to and dinner on the table.
My mom always has been a strong, independent woman. I guess that's where I get it from. And I am glad. In school, I cannot tell you how many times I had to write a paper about my hero. I would write about my mom. I know, to the teachers it was probably just "oh what a suck-up". What they probably didn't realize though is that I truly meant it. My mom is my hero. She is strong and courageous...not many mom's can tell their 11 and 12 year old daughters that daddy died and comfort her children without going hysterical (even if she felt like it). Not many would sacrifice everything to work at a job she didn't like just so that her kids could figure skate or play soccer.
But now I want my mommy to do something for herself. Every night for the past week I've prayed to my Heavenly Father to give her the strength to go back to college and get a certificate. Nothing would make me happier than to see my mom walk across that stage in a cap and gown, getting her college certificate (and to be even cooler, get it the same year I get my second Associates degree though unfortunately that will not happen)....to see her finish what she has already started. It would make me proud to see that she would finally get what she needed.
Of course, I am already proud of her as it is. I could not have ever asked for a better mother. She is strong, witty, funny, kind, sacrificing, and always willing to help out those in need even though she is not well off herself. My mom is always donating clothing or money or canned goods to someone somewhere. I only wish I could be as generous as she is.
I pray that G-d protects her and helps her. I know that He finds favor with His obedient and kind daughter. I know that He will bless her and hold her in high regard. She is a wonderful human being and I love her so much. I am proud to call her my "mommy".
